Angelic Grace

[Natasha Dentee]

"Urggh! Why isn't this working?!" I muttered to my self angerly.

"Need some help?" A male voice came from above my head.

I had been working on my solo for a week and it still hadn't come out right. I was bent over with my head on my lap, I rubbed my tempels to try and rid the ache that began to form.

"Tash, do you want help." He asked again. I looked up to see Damien standing above me, looking down at me and the sheet music that way laying infront of me.

"No, I will figure it out I guess." I said with a shy, picking up the papers and pretending to read it. He continued to look over my shoulder at the sheet. Annoyed I looked up at him.

"Can I help you?" I asked, trying hard not to show my annoyance.

"No, but please, I heard you trying to sign this before, and don't get me wrong, it is alright, but your high C is-" He began before I cut him off.

"You just leave me high C alone." I said trying to get him to leave.

"No, it is good but you need to breath deeper, it is a long note and your voice cracks when you do and it is becomes a very unattractive note." He said all in one breath so that I couldn't cut him off.

<tag damien>

[Damien Jamison]

I smirked, knowing i had her defeated. No cutoffs at this point. I hoped none in the future. Although, as far as I had seen, i could outhold her note anyday, so if she even tried to start cutting me off, A long breath would just wipe the floor with her hair as a mop.

I dazed off, looking at the music and thinking back to my rock and roll days, back when life was simple and medications didn't really matter. I was useful, sometimes frontman, sometimes background for melody, the band moved me around. And then the bloody battle, and I'm where i am now...great.

Suddenly my beeper on my waist went off...who has beepers anymore? The fact that i was so modern usually made me laugh, but it was the Indie life. I erected myself and looked at the flashing panel. It had been 4 hours. Natasha was looking at me, confused, only to get my rolling eyes and smirk in return. I turned around and shuffled through my bag, looking for the pills and water.

I found the orange vial and bottle easily. Removing the child proof cap, I tossed my head back, popping two capsules into the back of my throat and spraying a jetsam of water in their wake. Swallowing hard, I turned on my heal and then looked over Natasha's shoulder again.

"Nothing deters you...does it?" she joked. I grinned, bouncing my eyebrows in response. A small quake ran through the ground, moving the ground as if it was water, I was at it's epicenter.

"ok, how about we start with a beat for you to go off of?" I suggested, starting to tap my foot to the measure. Once I got the beat, i started snapping... "go..." i ushered her on...

<tag Natasha>

[Natasha Dentee]

After 2 hours of practicing with Damein, I think I finally got it.

"Good, but just one more thing." He said as I rolled my eyes.

"I think it is pretty good!" I said in defence, knowing that I would do what he asked me to do but just wanted an argument for some reason.

"Well do you want to be good? Or great?" He asked raising an eyebrow at me. He had me there so I just huffed and leaned on the piano he was sitting at.

"Fine, what else is wrong with it oh master of music." I asked with a strained smile.

"When you sing the song sing it nice, but you need to put more emotion into it. This is a sad song. She is trying to move on with her life after he broke her heart. You sing it as if you had nothing else better to do." He said with a dazed look, as if he could see the musical story happen before him.

"How do I put that into it? I tried." I said knowing a memory that could help me, but thinking about it hurt to much.

"You don't have a memory that could help you with this." He asked as if reading my thoughts.

I was silent and looked away.

"So there is, why do you not just use that?" He asked.

"Who wants to have the past haunt them?" I asked bitterly

"Someone who needs to feel. " He said grabbing my chin and turned it to face it, making me look him right in the eye.

"You know nothing of what I feel." I said standing up and turning around.

"I may not, but I know that you need to tap into whatever memory that is and use it." He said getting up. "When you are ready to do that, come and find me." He said starting to leave.

I sat at the piano, looking off into the room. "Alright, come on lets give it a try." I said as he reached for the door.

<tag damien, my musical wonder>

[Damien Jamison]

"Good" I said walking back to the piano and sitting down at the piano, resting my fingers on the keys, and applying suttle pressures. The notes chimed in, suddenly stopping as i withdrew my fingers and swiveled, looking at her. "first, lets try an exercize, just to TRY to tap in"

I turned back to the keys and played a few notes. Thinking of a song that could relate, but at the same time, make anyone long for their relationship, once lost. "ok, i know the song, i'm thinking of its story. when you sing, do the same thing...ok, the song, the story. Now, when did i feel this." I fell silent for a moment, I must have done this exercize a million times, why was I not numb. I coughed, redirecting my sorrow. "Year, Two thousand and three, date, October fourteenth...time, six thirty seven" The memories burned into my mind, I would never forget. "what happened. I had been diagnosed for three days, i finally told her, she never spoke to me again." A stab in my chest. It never got any easier.

My fingers pushed down into the keys, first a series of dark notes, and then lighter ones. My fingers knew this song instinctively, so i closed my eyes, and just fell into the song.

"My empty promises / Led to our demise / And I could never tell you how I really feel / And for that I eternally apologize " i began to sing, my voice growing as i fell further and further into the story line. Two people, very much in love, and then, a stupid mistake by the male counterpart, sends them spiraling into a path of destruction. He finally confirms the end with this song, basically a thank you for the good times, but good riddance anyway.

I could feel her eyes burn on me as I continued playing through the song, but soon I was deeper and deeper, I couldn't feel anyone.
I began screaming the last verse of the song, feeling the depression and hurt deeper and deeper inside of me. "You seem like such a big part / Of my life and my heart / But the truth is I've found something new / And she easily towers over you/ You seem like such a big part / Of my life and my heart / But the truth is I've found something new / And she easily towers over you" I slumped backwards, and slowly looked at her, grinning. The pain was there, but the release was so much greater.

"Now, let me start, recite the same thing as I did, tap into your memories...nothings too bad...past is the past..." I said reassuringly, placing my fingers back on the black and white keys. I nodded understandingly as she said her spieal, when she was done, i started playing the song. Soon, she started singing, and it was more convincing, tenfold.

I liked her song's story better, the girl screwed up, and the guy walked away. But i could relate to my story, i screwed up, everything was my fault.

Damn, I hate reality.

She finished and i snapped back to reality. I began clapping, deftly. "great" i said, convincingly enough i guessed. I however, was too delved in how much I screwed up, in my own world. Everything's about me.

"so, anything else you need?" i asked, coming slowly back to reality.

"well..." she started "nothing" quickly changing her mind. I got a bit irritated, women were so closed off i hated it. I hated most women these days, since they mostly hated me. Or, never saw a romantic relationship with me. Like i said, women hated me.

"If after all this work, you suck at this, I'm hitting you" I warned, despite being the "nice guy" I had a violent side. And i wasn't afraid to use it, especially when you have friends like i did, you had to know how to take a hit. Boy, could I take a hit.

"Stagefright" She said, blushing. I groaned, hitting the low keys three times with my fist, getting progressively lower. It was meant to sound like that 'wa wa waahhh' sound that happens on sitcoms when something so rediculously stupid came up that it was a 'oh no you didn't' moment. Yeah, I knew about sitcoms.

"How about this" I started "humans will always hate you, for one reason or another, giving them a reason by sucking, or giving into their opressive nature, will NOT help..." I said, point blankly "don't give them the benefit of seeing you squirm...you hate them, they hate you, its war"

not exactly a GOOD way of looking at it, but it usually worked.

<tag- natasha>

[Natasha Dentee]

I stared at him my mouth open.

"You've got to be kidding me." I said looking at him in disbelief.

"What? It's true." He said with a shrug.

"Hun, that didn't help at all! Actually, I think that made it worse." I groaned and put my head down on the piano keys. They felt cool against my head despite the fact that Damien had been playing them for the past few hours.

"Why not?" He asked bewildered.

"Because that is such a bleak out look on it that it makes me feel worse!" I said starting to play some notes with my nose.

"I-What are you doing?" He asked looking at me oddly.

"Pretending that the keys are your face, and my nose is a fist" I said looking innocently up at him.

"Well, if that is a thanks for helping, you really do need to work on you manners." He said with a grin.

"What are we going to do with my stage fright? I am performing my song in two days! And I still choke up when there is more then 1 person in the room." I said with a sigh, once again putting my face against the cold piano.

We sat in silence as he thought about it for a moment. After a while I couldn't bare the silence and played a few notes on the piano.

"I've got it!" He said and stood up.

"Follow me." He said and turned to leave.

<tag dameinnnn>

[Damien Jamison]

I escorted her into the auditorium. There was a stage, which, in general made people shake. It was going to be kind of like american idol, or auditions, it was one on one, and sometimes intimidating.

"hop on up" I said, patting the stage as i walked past it, not even hesitating to look at it. I moved into the center section and sat in the middle of it. I watched as she carelessly used the front of the stge, instead of the stairs. She clumisly crawled onto the stage, causing me to smirk.

"Now what" she yelled, centered on the stage. I shook my head, sometimes she was denser than osmonium.

"Sing!" i said, among laughing, this was rediculous. She cocked her head, and her leg started to shake, yeah, she was scared. She hadn't even been on stage for a a minute, and she was getting nervous. "GREAT!" I yelled at her, still grinning.

"WHAT?!" she yelled Her voice wavering a bit. "what did i do?!"

"you're scared!" i yelled back. "thats awesome!"

"no i'm not!" she denied...

i rolled my eyes and looked at her "Fine, then sing"

<tag natasha>

[Natasha Dentee]

"Fine" I said waited for him to start with the music.

The music began and I opened my mouth to sing. Nothing came out. Damien raised his eyebrow and started the music again.

Come on Tasha, You can do this. Just breath and sing.. Just breath and sing.

I opened my mouth to sing again, but it just wasn't working. Frustrated I pushed my hand through my hair and sat down on the end of the stage.

"I don't get it! I just don't get it!" I yelled in frustration.

"From the sound of your voice, it sounds like you've be singing for a while" He said.

"Oh, yes, my shower head is very impressed." I said sarcastically.

"You mean to tell me that you've never done this before." He asked with his eyebrow raised.

"Yes, that is exactly it. I have never done something like this before. The only reason I am doing this is because Mr. Adam's begged me to sing at the show, his last act dropped out." I explained.

"And did he know of your stage fright." He asked.

"Of course! I told him that!" I said.

"And he said what?" He asked again.

"He said he could help me with it, if I wanted to." I said softly.

"Then what am I doing here?" He said in a bored tone.

"Helping out a friend?" I said hopefully.

He looked at me a moment and sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Alright, back on stage. Front and center."

<taggggggggggggggggg damein>

[Damien Jamison]

I rested my head on the back of the seat, which was a long streach, of course. Considering my height and all. My neck didn't hurt, my head did though.

"and a one two three four, check your stagefright at the door, five six seven eight, dont make me impale my hand on a gate. Nine ten eleven twelve..." She cut me off before i could finish

"OK I GET IT" she yelled from the stage. She looked mad, eh well. I shrugged, giving a look of innocence.

She started, but it was a sqeak. Damnit, it was hopeless. I got up and started to walk out. "what, were are you going!" she yelled from the stage.

"Expirimenting...dont move" I said, i left the auditorium and stood with the door open. I yelled in "SING!"

She started singing, and it was fine. Great, beakthrough! "GOOD" i yelled in.

"uh, when are you gonna come back in?!" she yelled. i grinned and rolled my eyes.

"i dunno, maybe we'll do this for the show!" i yelled in. "naw, hold on"

I walked in a bit, but only put my hand in her line of sight. "SING!" i yelled, and she did just as good as before. Excelent! "Phenominal"

I took a step further, my whole arm and a bit of my foot. "SING!" Still good! YES! i was a genius.

After about an hour or so, all of me was in her line of sight and she was singing. I started clapping my hands towards the end of the song. Brlliant! "GOOD! GREAT!" two hours was at least not completely wasted.

<tag Natashhhhh>

[Natasha Dentee]

It was opening night, and I was extreamly nervous.

I turned to Damien and looked at him.

"What if I screw up?" I asked.

"Then people will laugh." He said bluntly.

"Nice, how about something incouraging?" I asked hurt, not letting it show.

He grabbed my shoulders and look right at me.

"You will do fine, you and I have been practicing for 2 days. You can do it, I will be right here, watching you do this. You know you can." He said.

I went to say something more, but they annouced my name.

I looked at him, and nodded.

I can do this. I can do this.

I walked onto the stage and froze. The music started and I just looked out at the crowd.

Oh god, I can't do this.

I turned to walk back and Damien stood in my path.

"I can't do this." I said looking tearfully away, ashamed.

"Yes you can. You have done it a million times." He said encouragingly.

"Yes, but not infont of people." I said and started to walk off stage.

<tag damien (ha try getting out of that one!)>

[Damien Jamison]

I tapped my foot irritably, so all that time would be wasted, eh? No freakin way. I grunted as she walked towards me, i already tried to stop her, so that would just be effort, and probably time wasted. The audience started to look around, and a portly man, started to get up. He started yelling at the croud and some more got up. Brilliant Natasha, freaking brilliant.

Grunting, I ran out from behind the curtain, I didn't know what i was gonna do, but, something needed to be done. I trotted to the microphone, and adjusted my fingerless gloves before gripping it. Some people looked at me, and i looked ight back. Yes, I looked funny, I looked like a goth who didn't give two Sh!ts if the show faltered or not. Well, technically I didn't care, but, you know, those where two days I'm never going to get back, so I had to do something.

I was making it up as i went along.

"Uh, Hey everyone...." I said into the mic. Hearing you voice boom at a 30 centisecond delay never ceased to freak me out. "eh, we're just having some problems currently, if you all will just wait, our act will be out in a second."

the portly man screamed obscenities at me, he was definitely a sport's dad. Although, it was hard to miss, the letterman jacket, the whistle, among other aspects of his appearance that gave it away. I growled as I took each hit. Now for a little fun.

"excuse me sir, which kid was yours?" i asked, thinking coyly.
"hannah burgeron" He said, proud of his ballerina who stole the hearts of audiences with her rendition of 'big white bird in a glorified puddle' or, what's what i called it.

"OH, the girl who can dance, but cant draw a stick figure?" The croud laughed at my comment, as the father began walking towards the aisle, turning a shade of red so bright, i wonder if Crayola could make a crayon out of it. "ok, mr burgeron, back to you're seat, i'm sure you're face says enough."

The crowd laughed again, and he only turned redder, but still worked his way to the aisle. "i'll kill you" he yelled.

"The academy does not condone that kind of violence, back to your seat." He grumbled as he turned around, and struggled back to his seat.

"alright, now, there was a point to this. Oh yeah, well, i dont expect to have Hannah up here and painting a freaking sistine chapel, but that's not the same correlation to our next act. She can sing oh boy, but, she doesn't do crowds, believe me, her shower head is very impressed with her! but, i need to ask you guys a favor..." the crowd looked at me expectantly "if you dont have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. Really, cheer if she's good, but dont boo her down, cause she'll hurt me. She's never really done this before, so we gotta make it so she knows you guys will like her, i might be on stage with her, doing crazy things, dont laugh, just, apreciate the music. Thank you all and enjoy the show!"

I jumped off stage and into the pit, sitting at the piano and nudging the player aside, he looked angry, but i started to explain. "i gotta do this, but, follow along, if she starts to die, i gotta get up there and you need to take over. Got it?" the player nodded, and i rested my fingers on the keys.

I played the first five seconds of the song i showed how to sing with, 3685, so she would know i was playing piano, and then, changed gracefully to her song, waiting for her to come on stage.


<tagggg natttie>

[Natasha Dentee]

I heard Damein start playing the piano and I stuck my head out of from behind that curtain. There he was, sitting looking up at me, waiting for me to come out. Then I looked at the crowd, they weren't rowdy at all, they were waiting there, for me to come out.

Come on Tash, just walk out there.

Somehow that got me going, and my feet dragged me to center stage.

I opened my mouth, and a squeak came out.

Oh no, not again.

I cleared my throat again, and tried. a weak note came out.

Come on Natasha. Damnit girl! You can do this, Damien wouldn't have sent you up if you could.

With that in mind, I closed my eye and started my song. And it worked! I felt the words that came out of my mouth, letting the song have everything I could give it.

I kept my eyes closed for half of the song, until Damien messed up a note and I opened my eyes and looked right at him. He had a smile on his face, telling me he did that on propose. I kept eye contact with him until the last long note then looked out at the crowd. There was only silence, which shocked me, because I thought I did a great job. I guess not, because all they did was look at me.

Oh god, did I do that bad?
<tag my hero Damien>

[Damien Jamison]

The crowd didn't seem to notice the mess up in notes but she did,I had found it hard to stifle my laugh, so i just bounced foreword on the keys. She had her eyes so harshly on me, i felt them penetrate my clothing, and i was just as naked as she was on stage, which made me a bit nauseous. I liked being on stage from time to time, i dont like being the object of someone's eye. I shifted with every song as her gaze bore into me, grintting my teeth as a physical way to rid my discomfort.

My beeper was on vibrate, what a time for it to go off. Although, i had to wait out the song, my fingers were pretty much glued to the keys, there was no hope. The vibrating on my hipbone was a bit unnerving and irritating, i wanted it to stop, but it was relentless. I adopted the sound in my ears, and it started hurting. The discomfort of being this naked was getting to me.

Thank god this did not effect my playing. I knew the song better than anyone, having studied is when i learned i had to help out. Music theory was a great thing. I couldn't stop playing if i was cast into a coma.

Suddenly, the nakedness quit, and the song ended. i grabbed the front of my shirt, yep, i was clothed. Immediately i rid my hip of that incessant vibrating. YES YES YES! Reaching into my pocket, I grabbed my wallet and took out some spare medicine, and swallowed them dry. But only then, after the ringing of my ears subsided, did i notice the sound.

Silence. i looked nervously to find some clue as to why no music of crowds rang out, why no chorus of impressment existed. Why why why? I grunted, but then thought, i had warned them, maybe they were just scared.

I clapped my hands loudly, bobbing up and down with the ferocity of the impacts. The other players in the pit looked at me bewildered, until they too, understood, and started clapping. That was enough, and the crowd roared into a glorious upheaval of enjoyment. I jumped from the piano seet and ran through the pit, carelessly ignoring the stairs and just jumping onto the stage. I ran to the mic and grabbed it. Watching as they started to die, and return to their seats.

"thank you everyone! We had a great time!" I said into the mic, a bit out of breath from my own happiness "you guys were so kind, thank you, thank you!" I looked to the performers peeking out, to look at the crowd. I grinned and wove my arm for everyone "come on out here you guys and get your rightful applaus!" Out poured the entire show, filling the stage full. "thank you, thank you guys."

The crowd still roared. Was this the encour that my performance buddies had told me about? Did they want more?

"You guys want something else to satisfy your hungerrrr?!" I roared into the mic, getting another roar of agreement from the croud. "Do you want something to FEEEEED ONNN?!" i yelled, getting another roar.

Natasha was pressed by me, due to all of us on one stage. "what are we gonna do?!" she said, right in my ear.

"well, its gotta rock" i said, grinning. She seemed a bit skeptic of what would go down. But then again, she had an entire life to live.

"LB ACADEMY!" i yelled, turning to the crowd of students behind me "are you freaking ready to rock!?" They screamed in response and started jumping up and down, almost like a very tame, very safe mosh pit.

"Audience!" i turned to look at them "Are YOU ready to rock?!" another roar

[Natasha Dentee]

All I could think was, "Oh my god, what is he doing?!" I looked at him as if he had two heads. We had only practiced one other song, and that was just us joking around.

"What are we gonna do?!" I hissed in his ear.

"We're gonna rock." He said with a grin.

That's when he started to get the crowd going.

"Oh Lord, help us now!" I prayed

He jumped down off the stage and handed the guy at the paino something. Then the guys in the band something.

That jerk! He had been planning this all along!

This song was of two people in a fight, what they went through and how they make up. And trust me, I could relate to the girl that was pissed.

The song started with the drummer and my line. I sang it with all my anger and frusteration.

Then he sang, while giving me a questioning look.

<Tag my assholeish friend Damien>

[Damien Jamison]

"WHOAAAAA" i screamed into the microphone, in response to her line. The mosh pit behind us getting more and more rowdy.

"I was almost done,
just close enough, close enough
Never thought this would happen,
Unleash a monster, I'll unleash a beast
GET THE @*%# AWAY FROM ME!" I screamed into the mic. Sure, it could have offended some parents, but i was a goth who didn't care about the show, so I wasn't too concerned.

Although, Natasha was, giving me her worst looks, she didn't like this much, the attention, th excitement. Well, her loss...live while you can.

I bent down and did "grabby hands" to the guitarist. They couldn't play this as well as i could...i wrote it. Soon, the axe was in my hands, i felt powerful.

I straightened up and began playing chord after solemn chord to go with the music. The song was sad in itself, however, the guitar made an exciting, happy tone to the music. I grinned and leaned towards the mic, repeating my verse again
"unleash the beast, unleash the beast
get away get away
get away from me!"

[Natasha Dentee]

"Get outta my way
Get outta my way.
You've done this all before,
Now I'm walking out the door."

I sang my heart out, this wasn't normally my type of music, but it was fun, and I was feeling the rush of everything happening.

Damien sang his responce lyrics and it blew me away, he got so into it sometimes it ways scary.

He did his solo and the song was almost over, the lyrics spilling from my mouth into the crowd, and they were eating it all up.

"Don't do it again.
Don't do it again." I sang as I walked over to him, I pushed his a bit, and he fell to the floor like he always did.

"Your all the same.
Playing the game,
Will you ever grow up?
Or will I always be stuck
with this messed up !@#$" I was singing to him as he was on the ground, with my foot on his chest holding him down. He raised his eye brow at my lyrics, but I didn't care, I was to into it to notice.

<Damien my groveling pet>