Spire of Desire

[Xartarin]

The Isle of Fate

The immense black obelisk was a scar on the green pastures and quiet beach it surrounded. It stretched into the sky, seemingly endless. The tower's roof could very well be in space, or not exist at all. It could be seen from miles and miles away. Nonsensical designs raced up the side of the inky darkness. This wasn't a structure built by human hands, that much was certain. It was completely seamless, not made of bricks or stones, metal or concrete, but some kind of alien-looking obsidian.

It didn't seem like such a thing could exist. The tower made all who see it rub their eyes and check to see if they were hallucinating. But there it was, the solitary structure on a large island inhabited mostly by grass and oak trees. Unreal, unbelievable, but very much existing.

The tower was as old as time itself. Near the island was a continent, still within eyesight of the tower. Everyone who lived by the coast knew of it, and saw it as one would see a nearby mountain, a part of the scenery, of nature. But whenever anyone visited, from other parts of the world, from other worlds or dimensions, the tower always struck them as one of the oddest things they have ever seen.

In years past the entrance was always blocked. There were no entryways, everything sealed by black obsidian. But something strange happened, just a few weeks ago. The spire, with its immense divine power, began calling out. Everyone interested, with the means and power heard it. Within a week the place was swarming. It was quite the lucky break for Headhunters Inc. who was manufacturing the devices everyone was using to travel there.

Some people came, some people left, some people were lucky enough to arrive there just as things kicked off. At midnight, on the summer solstice, when some cat somewhere was yawning, the doors appeared. Simply faded into existence.

A crowd of people circled around it. There were multiple entrances all along the tower, each one with a number carved above it. Five entrances, to be precise. The wind bellowed, whipping into the tower, beckoning everyone inside. Indeed, some nameless force tugged on the conscience of every sentient being around, and let them know that their dearest struggles would be remedied inside. Every creature with a goal in mind and determination in their heart took steps forward, and walked determinately into the tower. Those that were too afraid stepped back, dismissing the adventurous as insane.

Floor 1

The inside of the tower was quite large. Even entrances that were the closest to each other were far apart. All the walls, the ceiling, and the floor were lined with brown bricks that betrayed the seamless look of the tower outside. It looked old and a bit damp. There was moss and ferns growing everywhere. Far away, in the center of the floor, was a large pillar. Spiraling around it were five staircases enclosed by large tubes, one for each entrance of the tower. They were textured similarly to the outside of the tower, jet black. It was if a smaller black tower was running through the center of the larger one.

A small bright light descended from the ceiling, moving like a ghost. Where it was and what it looked like varied on the person viewing, like an illusion. It always landed directly in front of the viewer in their eyes, and took a form they were familiar with. Someone from their past, no doubt. Whether was it was a loved one, a former friend, or even a sworn enemy, that depended on the person.

"Greetings, travelers. Welcome, to our tower. I am the messenger of the Gods that reside here, Mindjask. I suppose it goes without saying why you have all come. The reward for completing our challenges is nothing short than anything you could possibly desire. What remains to be made clear is what you shall encounter on the way up. Perilous challenges, testing your fighting ability, your courage, your charisma, your intellect, and every facet of your being. I apologize, but there's really no clear answer. You'll have to see for yourself.

"Take one step forward, and you are a part of this competition. You agree to our terms and services and accept that we cannot be held liable for your safety while inside the tower."

[Chocolate Kirby]

((I'd grab a snack before reading this...jeez.))

Popstar, for me is known as two things. Lush landscapes...and portals. Seriously, this is really the hubub of the universe and don't let anyone tell you different! A huge fraction of the population are from other dimensions. Most of them go to that stupid arena in the dessert, but that's besides the point.

So when we hear about the "Spire of Desire" (it's probably the biggest topic since Dedede's hammer was stolen or something), Kirbot (my awesome robot buddy) and I (your main character!) decided we'd have to go to it if we wanted to cure Kirbot.

What happened to Kirbot, you ask? Well, I was getting there you dumb***, be patient. You see, ever since we got our memories wiped (and boy did THAT suck) how long ago, I decided to backup Kirbot's memory on my computer since HE could get it back if that happened again. It's also a good archive for people we know.

Anyways, it had finally rained (our hill had a drought for a while) and it was a thunderstorm. So that night, before bed, I hooked Kirbot up and his hard drive was copying to the server that we used. We recently got it and it seemed reliable, a lot of other people stored and shared stuff on it, but BOY did it download slow.

So while we were waiting, lightning struck the house. My house has a lightning rod and all those power strips, but no room for the router. So the internet became unstable for a second. And THEN a virus (who stores a virus) used the opening to get on OUR database! And like a mosquito, we were taking AND putting in stuff, so some of that virus infected Kirbot. Of course, that "some" was so small that we didn't realize it early enough. Like that cancer stuff or whatever those humans call it.

So the next morning (though nice and wet with rain), the virus (named N/A, as I found out) was found by myself, but it was big enough now to cohere to Kirbot's hard drive. Luckily, I beat it down (not literally you dolt!) so that it would grow slower. Currently it has no effect on Kirbot, but soon it will. Stuff to remove it from ROBOTS is WAY TOO EXPENSIVE. So when we're groping for a solution and a rumor like this comes around, we HAVE to jump into the portal to the so called "Island of Fate" (banal, I know) if we want this virus gone and Kirbot alive.

Okay, so that is why we're in front of this giant tower. I'm sure by the beginning first person was awkward, so now that we got the past over with we can tell this tale in GLORIOUS HIGH-DEFINITION 3RD PERSON!


Isle of Fate

Cwis and Kirbot stared up at the monotonous mass of...what was this? "So all we have to do is climb...this, get the virus removed or the money to remove it, then go back home. Easy...as...d***, are ALL these people selfish?" Cwis swore loudly in frustration. "I have a dying best friend on my hands and most people are probably wishing for endless supplies of money!"

Cwis, despite Kirbot's best convincing powers, thought that this was all his fault and felt extremely guilty...something only Kirbot could let happen to him. So Kirbot could tell that he was determined. And most people thought that Cwis was an inconsiderate jerk, but this whole adventure was proving the OPPOSITE, even if he had to let more people think that.

The crowd was shifting; entering. "C'mon. Let's go." Cwis grumbled loud enough over the excited crowd. They went over the 1 entrance. Kirbot thought that Cwis was going to say a remark about how he was #1, so he HAD to go in there, but Cwis didn't even notice and just went in the closest entrance.

The tower had a huge interior, a nice site. The crowd somewhat separated and was loud as the sounds echoed off the black walls. However, it was damp, and Cwis reached into ???'s bag and used the inhaler. Hopefully the rest of the tower had nice enough air, or Cwis would have to wear that ridiculous helmet throughout the whole trip!

As everyone began settling, a light came down from the ceiling and appeared in front of both Cwis and Kirbot before fading into familiar forms, Sapphire and Tharbot. Cwis smelled the sweet scent of attar that Sapphire usually wore, which almost distracted him from the confusion of her being here. Yeah...he had a crush on her, but clam it. As for Kirbot, he thought that Tharbot didn't originally have bad intentions and could be made to be a good clone-of-a-clone. It was only when the vocabulary that wouldn't come from either of them that convinced them it was an illusion. Sapphire never talked anyways.

After the "speech" that Cwis ALREADY KNEW, he asked, "By Terms and Conditions...does that have 'you sell your soul to us in there'? I remember that prank, but still..." Kirbot shoved him in a way that said 'shut it and let's go'.

Other people's strides weren't restricted because of lack of legs, so they went farther in their step. Other people actually gave him looks, for his shape AND color (he hated that...oh so much). But he stepped up anyways. So did Kirbot. "Let's hope 75% of this tower ain't stairs!"

5th Floor

Alexander was giddy today. Today was when the gates opened. Today was when he could finally have guests. Today was the day!

He must've walked around the floor a million times, fine tuning small errors. Now he was setting up the lobby, a fancy room with crafted furniture and a red carpet. Blood red; Alex's favorite color. He wore his usual suit with a red robe on top as he decked the hall (more like tables) with food for the travelers that could make it up here. A LOT of food was present, from turkey to seaweed flavored Pringles. Too bad this room was so off setting of the rest of the floors, but that was a nice mind trap for them.
Then he rehearsed his speech a few times again. Alex personally liked being face to face with an audience, he was a people person. Also, the attire was interesting as well. He didn't like Mindjask to do what he likes and he also doesn't like how Mindjask and a select few other deities appeared in other forms. Trickery was his game, but that was just sooooo cliche! Today he'd appear as himself, top hat and all.

Today was going to be a WONDERFUL day, indeed.

[Rick]

Isle of Fate

A van rolled up outside the third entrance. It was entirely black, its windows tinted. Its back doors burst open, and a humanoid robot was unceremoniously booted out of the van. It began to drive off, as someone called "Try not to get killed!". The robot simply lay on the ground where it landed. Something inside its head was whirring, causing the head to vibrate slightly. Then it stopped with a loud "CHUNK" noise, and the robot climbed to its feet. People were passing it, heading into the tower, some looking at him as they passed. Things continued to whirr and clunk inside it. The robot turned to the entrance it was dumped outside, and looked up at the number carved above it. 3. The third entrance. Still crowded with the hordes of curious, greedy, interested, haughty people, looking for all manner of riches, it would seem. The robot spoke in a clear, masculine voice that had only a slight tinge of a voice synthesizer to it.

>All systems online.
>SA-LUK-10 "Wheel Of Fortune" is alive.

The robot, hereafter referred to as "LUK", followed the crowd into the tower. It stopped dead on entering.

Floor 1

>Running Dice Roller.exe...
>Result is 3. Performing Secondary Roll...
>Result is 4.

((OOOOOOOOOH SHIT))


>Activating Effect #3: "True Form"
>Activated

LUK's exoskeleton began to change colour. He began to grow taller. A top hat and monocle formed on his head, complimented by a thin, well-groomed moustache and a short beard. He began to turn into a human...wearing a flamboyantly pink speedo that was at least one size too short (if you catch my drift). Needless to say such a transformation managed to catch the attention of everyone there. And if it didn't...

"I..." LUK began, with a devilishly arousing French accent, "Put the "ass" in "class". He slapped said ass to make his point.

>Running Sunchyme.mp3...

((Sunchyme, by Dario G))

And then the music started playing, at which point LUK proceeded to drop to all fours and do a startling impression of an animal struggling in blazing desert heat to make it to the watering hole. And goddammit, he would die trying. He screwed his face up, he let his tongue hang out, he twitched his extremities suggestively. He even crowed a bit here, cawed a bit there, mewed once or twice.

If you weren't aroused or disgusted, you were simply incapable of handling the situation.

((EDIT: To clarify, everyone on the floor can hear the music.))

[Ze Pyro]

((Rick, you have BY FAR, the most awsome character ever.))
((EVER!))

[Aki]

The Isle of Fate

Click!

There was a bright flash as Maggie entered the room. Her entrance was branded with a lovely number; a great big number one. Obviously, it was because she was number one! And if she wasn't already number one, then she was gonna be number one by the time she hit the top of that great big tower thingermajigger.

She held her camera close to her. There were so many people here, she was a little afraid that somebody would try to take it. It was a family heirloom and couldn't be used by anybody who wasn't directly descended from the Zene family, but even so, if she lost it, she wasn't getting up that tower any time soon.

"There are so many people...." said Maggie, eyes wide. Adventurers crowded her all over, and she was a little afraid of what would happen if she got into a fight. She'd probably be fine. After all, she did have the Miracle Eye...! With this, surely she would be unstoppable...

Then the music came on, and Maggie clasped both hands over her ears. Well, the Miracle Eye couldn't stop everything.

2nd Floor

The Judge placed both palms on his marble desk contentedly. Today was the big day! After so very long in the Spire, with nobody to comfort him but other lawless, self-centered deities, he would finally see new faces. Finally would he be able to test them. He would see for himself if those outside the Spire were just as lawless as those within.

From what he could tell, the other gods that inhabited the Spire were chaotic, manipulative or otherwise just all around psychotic. He hadn't the power to keep them in line, and so he had no choice but to let them run rampant. But now, he was the one who would be running rampant with his power. He would use his power for good, though, and not evil. He would use it to enforce the law, to keep order, to make sure justice was delivered.

And in the end, only the lawful would survive...

He took a long drink from a porcelain mug of coffee. Today was going to be a good day.

This post has been edited by Aki on Aug 16 2010, 04:16 PM

[Star Kirby]

Isle of Fate

There weren't many too advantages being from a medieval era, Kent observed. He'd been in this time for close to two months now, and was getting slightly desperate for a way back. The world was way too advanced for him now, with their fancy guns and cars and battery phones and whatever. No, he preferred the simplicity of his own time, where you only had to worry about an opponent hacking your head off instead of blowing holes in you or a hundred other ways everyone had apparently found to kill someone.

On the other hand, the world was also kind of... Well, cool (a word he had picked up while wandering around). It had only been two months, after all, and maybe if he stayed, he would eventually get used to everything.

But on the other other hand, he didn't really want to break the time-space continuum by either staying too long here or bringing back new technology. Which was of course why Kent was ascending the tower.

Quite a few people were already in the tower, and Kent hurried through an entrance that had a number one clearly printed above it. A bright flash disorientated him momentarily, and he blinked. Some girl in front of him had a... What was it called again? Apparently it could freeze time on a piece of parchment or something, but he supposed it wasn't the right time to gawk over yet another piece of modern technology. So he listened to the speech.

Floor Four

Celestia Elimine hummed contently as she observed the crowd at the foot of the tower. They seemed like a decent bunch, and maybe one of them had the bravery and valor to scale the Spire, and would gain the honor of meeting her, the goddess who could do absolutely anything.

And the rest of the deities. Not that they mattered.

It was a shame that the adventurers had to wait until the fourth floor though. But she supposed that they could bear it long enough. Celestia sighed dreamily and chugged half of her "water" bottle down.

[Rick]

First Floor

As the song came closer to its conclusion, LUK ceased the dying animal imitation, and sprung to his feet to start dancing...suggestively, one would suppose. Then the song ended, and he took a deep, deep bow, exposing the crack from which Hell itself leered through to the people behind him. He then promptly stood stock-still as he began to transform back into his regular self, exposing once again his mechanical insides to the world for a brief moment.

>...True Form effect has run its course.
>Notice to self for future reference: try your damnedest not to get that effect again.
>...Proceeding upstairs.

LUK moved to go up the stairs, until he saw Mindjask, at which point he stopped. Or rather, he saw a translucent form of his primary creator.

>Father...?
>...Recording message for future review.

He listened to Mindjask's speech, storing it for later. As the ghostly figure faded, LUK gazed at the ground, silently resolving to best this tower to make his father proud.

((EDIT: OH HEY LOOK A LIST WAS PUT ON THE WIKI))
((THANK YOU LOT FOR INFORMING ME OF THIS WHAT))
((THREE OR FOUR DAYS AFTER MAKING IT AND AGREEING ON IT))
((YOU CHUCKLEFUCKS))

Third Floor

Cúl Zayuus pranced about his floor, chuckling to himself and singing a merry tune. The tower was finally getting visitors! Finally! He could get to test his wits and might against that of the common people! And there would be violence! And laughter! And sex! He hoped fervently that the Judge could hold off the tides of people long enough for him to put the finishing touches on his floor; it would be oh so fun...

"I've got a lovely bunch of cannonballs, diddly dee dee..." he sang as he sent them flying with a flick of FRAGARACH, THE ANSWERER. He continued to hum it even when he was finished with them, wondering how best to trip up the roving hordes...

[William]

Sixth Floor

Theleza steepled her fingers, gently leaning both index fingers against her lips and both thumbs against her chin. As she sat on the darkness, her rings were shinning to an invisible source of light.

After what seemed like an eternity plunged into deep silence, she said: "Wishes and wishers and dreams and dreamers and hopes and desires and all that stuff..." She raised both hands and stood up. "I welcome you to the tower. Though you cannot hear me yet, I wish you all to know something: You will be mine." She stretched her fingers out, and the darkness were immediately filled by the vast scenery of a tropical beach with pristine waters. Letting her arms hang besides her body as each of the rings let out a soft whistle from the energy they had just wasted, Theleza crouched down and grabbed a handful of sand, and watched as it ran down through her fingers. Of one thing I am sure, I am the best there is at this stuff, she thought, producing a wooden chair and sitting by the ocean, watching as the newly-born animals and life woke up and started interacting with each-other.


First Floor

Right outside the tower's third entrance, a hawk with what looked like a top hat softly landed over a patch of grass. Well, technically it wasn't exactly a "soft landing", or "patch of grass"; Kyuu the cat had become a hawk to cross the gap between the continent and the island, but since he wasn't used to flying, his flight was shaky and he crashed metamorphosing-face-first against a boulder.

"Meouch", he moaned, turning back into his anthro-cat form. He slid down the rock, rubbing his metamorphosing face, before looking at the crowd of people currently entering the tower. "Guess I got the right place, nya. Though I don't clearly remember why this is the right place... But it's worth a look." He cleared his metamorphosing throat and turned into a tall, handsome man wearing a business suit when no-one was looking. He walked over to the entry, tightening his tie, a wide smile across his metamorphosing face. Humans like humans better. That's how things work and that's how they'll forever work. So I just have to put my smile on and what the fuck is that. His line of thought was stopped when he saw LUK ending his dance. He froze in place and watched as the then-human became a robot in shock.

"Good GOD, that was the greatest display of skills I have ever witnessed!!" Kyuu said, clapping his hands as fast as he could. "You are a wonderful being, how would you like it to explore this tower with me?" Only after saying that did he notice Mindjask. He looked exactly like Baldwig the wizard, which sent a shiver down Kyuu's metamorphosing spine. Baldwig..., he thought, crossing his metamorphosing arm in front of his metamorphosing chest and listening to the rest of the speech. "Sounds good to me, ny--" He started, talking with an almost cartoony voice, which caused him to stop mid-sentence, clear his throat and go on with a deeper voice: "I mean, that sounds good enough." Kyuu then took a step forwards, arms still crossed.

[Xartarin]

Outside

The wind rippled Sigurd's wraps. "Keep an eye on the tower until I come out," Sigurd said to the car next to him. It was sleek and black, and didn't have any wheels. Hubert the fish was driving, the window rolled down.

"Right-o, then" Hubert said, and the car started hovering in the air. He called down, "Try and find a way to contact me! I won't be here forever!" Sigurd nodded, and headed sternly into tower, through entrance #3.

"Sensors indicate a large amount of heat and magical energy in the nearby vicinity," Said HAL, "Are you sure about this? As far as power goes, we're outmatched." Casey was strutting into the tower regardless. "Most of these other people are older and stronger than you. Most of the people giving up are older and stronger than you. As an invention of your parents, I humbly request that you not embark on this foolishness."

"Please," Casey scoffed, as the entrance to the tower ran over her. She was headed into entrance #1. "Look at this thing! How could I NOT check it out? Besides, if the legends are true... well, just think about it!" Something close to a sigh sounded from the backpack.

Floor 1 - Preliminaries

Sigurd heard music, and turned his head. There was a man in a thong that Sigurd didn't care to look at. Unfortunately, Sigurd couldn't NOT look at him, having nearly 360 degree psychic vision and all. That's just plain silly, Sigurd thought, trying his hardest to ignore the strange man and stand aloof and mysteriously.

Mindjask appeared, in the form of Sigurd's most recent authority figure, Scout-HE. After listening to what the illusion had to say, Sigurd took one step forward, continuing to glare at Mindjask.

Casey nervously looked around at the other participants. Some looked like average people, some looked more epic or extreme, and some looked just plain odd. A moving suit of black armor was one oddity there, another was too round short people, one brownish and the other a robot. "This place is awesome!" Casey said to herself, excited. "I think I see someone here with a lizard tail. That's cool."

Mindjask appeared to her in the form of her parents, and told her to take a step forward if she wanted to continue on. "Alright," Casey said, taking a deep breath, and finally a large step, "Here goes nothing."

"Very well. The first challenge shall now commence." Just as Mindjask finished, the entire room shifted in dimensions. It grew larger, walls grew out of the ground, colorful fabric wrapped around everything, and finally a bright white light blinded everyone. Once it faded, the challenge was set up.

Suddenly, Mindjask's expression changed to one of fury and omnipotence, and its voice changed to bold text. Tielord was now communicating to everyone in the room via Mindjask. "GREETINGS, mortals! And immortals, if there are any in the room," Mindjask yelled with a deep rumbling voice, that had just a dash of synthesizer in it, "What lies before you is a simple obstacle course. Those of you that succeed, well done, but this'll be the easiest challenge you face. Those of you who perish or get left behind... you suck. I'm sorry, you kinda do. Now, get ready on my mark. One... two..."

One man immediately charged forward before Tielord was finished, and exploded into an assortment of ties.

"What an asshole," said Mindjask/Tielord said, "Okay now THREE! Go!" Finally, Mindjask disappeared, exploding in a small fireworks display.

Everything was made up of colorful fabric with various designs on it, stitched together like a quilt. It was kind of squishy to walk on. Each group was in a hallway, stretching down into the center staircases.

In front of each group was an obstacle that prevented them from seeing the rest of the obstacle course. It was a giant necktie sticking out of the ground, blocking anyone from progressing down the rest of the hallway. The hallway was rectangular in shape, and the necktie was an elongated pentagon, so there was still some space at the top to squeeze through. However, the main way to get past was in the center. A large hole in the tie, on fire, fifteen feet in the air.

The actual flaming ring was a ring in the middle of the circle in the tie, floating in midair.

After that was a tightrope made of neckties tied together, across a pit of necktie-shaped spikes a couple of yards long. It ended at short platform, and after that some monkeybars needed to be traversed to get across the next pit of spikes.

Once the pit of spikes ended, there was a rock climbing wall, 25 feet high. Participants needed to climb it, and then survive the drop off the other side. Following that was a smaller hallway filled with smashing crushing thingies that moved in a set rhythm.

Finally, the obstacle course ended with a pool. A swim across a pool to get to the main staircase.

"Have fun," Tielord said to himself, high above the course. All the threads he was composed of unraveled and fizzled out of existence. He was off to floor 7, to prepare his next challenge.



Sigurd looked at the ring of fire. I'll need a strategy to clear this. I can't jump fifteen feet, and I really can't be set on fire and live, Sigurd thought. He sat down, in a meditative-like position, and started thinking.

"Ha! Easy!" Casey said, a tad overconfident. Trying to be faster than everyone else, Casey quickly commanded, "HAL! Grappling hook gun, now!"

"Yes, m'lady," HAL replied, and out of the backpack sprung a miniature harpoon gun over Casey's right shoulder. It fired a large hook connected to a strong metal cable, which wrapped around the middle, flaming ring. Casey ran up to the wall and started walking up it as the grappling hook started retracting. As quickly as she could, Casey jumped up and through the ring, and was lowered down the other side by the grappling hook gun.

As it somehow untied itself and fell to the ground, the cable and hook were still pretty hot. Casey sat down waiting for it to cool, for if it were retracted now the heat would damage HAL.

((Go ahead and finish the whole course in one post if you want, I'm stopping here because I want to leave and to illustrate the passage of time.))

[Chocolate Kirby]

The first challenge was now starting. Finally. hopefully it wasn't some kind of stupid battle. Cwis didn't feel like doing that at the moment. And besides-"Wow, what the h***!?" Cwis was cut off by a wall growing out from under his left foot and toppling him over Kirbot. But the ground wasn't hard like he expected, it was...bouncy almost. He looked around to see everything covered in colorful fabric almost and the room looking bigger before. "AUGH, MY EYES!"

It was like getting blind again, but this time with white. When the light was gone, Cwis still saw the after effects of those colored dots in your eyes...against a colored wall. Before Cwis could recover, his ears thundered from Tielord's announcement. Sure, he heard it, but now he had a small headache. And by the time "GO!!" was announced, Cwis was still recovering his sight. Sure, he got them restored, but it was still like a scar.

After closing and wiping his eyes for a while, he could see at least okay enough. His headache was still there, but he ignored it as he encountered the giant tie in from of him. The way through was about 5 times the height of him. With fire.

Well, being a Kirby clone what else do you really do? Fly, right? Well...Cwis looked behind him at the other people in his "group". They probably couldn't do the same. So what else does a Kirby clone do besides being squishy? Right, Inhale!

But it was so high, could he even reach the fire from here? "Hey Kirbot, could yua fly me up to the hole?" Cwis turned around and asked. Kirbot nodded and ducked, which was when Cwis jumped on him. Cwis heard the engines start and braced himself, but Kirbot was slow with his accent. Hopefully this didn't drain the engine too much. Well, it didn't, but little things add up.

Now Cwis was about 5 feet from the flames, opposite them. He inhaled, then felt the heat in his mouth, making his eyes water before swallowing. He doned the Fire Hat, and that helped ease his headache. I won't be needing this, but might as well keep it for the headache...and just in case.

The hole was now empty of flame, making it an easy pass for Cwis and Kirbot, who shut off the jets when they landed. Cwis looked ahead and couldn't help but laugh. "This is like a child's playground! I could float over this if I wanted!" Cwis boasted, but he didn't. Why not have some fun? His body was ready!

He hopped off Kirbot and tested one foot on the TIE-ght rope. Sure it was made of ties, but boy was it sturdy. "This isn't your father's ordinary neck tie" Cwis muttered as he sidled with both feet across. Kirbot remained behind until Cwis finished with ease, then took the different approach of grabbing on from below. He weighed it down, but was still was one foot away from the spikes. "D***, that's some epic yarn..."

((OH TO HELL WITH THESE JOKES))

Once Kirbot reached the end of that "obstacle", he and Cwis both climbed the polls of the monkeybars and just used the bars as stepping stools from the top.

From his height, Cwis easily hovered up the wall while he gvae the backpack to Kirbot, who scaled the wall half as fast as Cwis flied. Cwis breathed for air at the top, which was when Kirbot caught up. When Cwis breathed easy, he inhaled and jumped, making a soft landing. Kirbot just jumped and used the jets near the bottom as not to crash.

Then Cwis looked wide eyed at the crushers. "Oh come ON-actually...this is an easy pattern. Let's just not get over-squished and trash compacted!" Cwis waited for the pattern to restart, then yelled, "GO!!" Kirbot was off, using the wheels under his feet at skates. Cwis was doing fine running. his asthma usually wasn't too bad on running, just inhaling and floating. When the end was near, Cwis saw Kirbot looking out for him, and he was almost at the end when the last crusher was coming down on him. Quickly, Cwis used his body as an advantage and crouched really low, then slid out only a second before it hit the ground and rose back up to repeat the process. Cwis saw a small flame on the end of the crusher, showing he barely made it. Hopefully it wouldn't catch on and make the pillars FLAMING! After the near heart attack, Cwis took a small breather while smiling at his achievement before looking at the next and last challenge.

Finally, the pool. It wouldn't've been a problem, Cwis can swim and Kirbot was watertight, but Cwis also had the fire ability and Kirbot couldn't stay in water too long, let alone be actively swimming, which he doesn't really know how to do that anyways.

"Uuuuuh......" Cwis was silent for a while. "This is stupid! I'll lose my ability and you can't swim! And I don't want you to use up all your fuel by the end of this! ...F***..." Cwis did one of his occasional "I need to think" poses before jumping unexpectedly. I got it! I always did this with Sapphire, but you might be a little heavier. Grab my foot and I'll hover us over!"
"What about your-"
"My asthma's fine! You can use the jets if you have to!"
And with that, Cwis jumped up and inflated, to where Kirbot had no choice but to grab on. The first part was okay, then Cwis began to feel his lungs struggle and the tip of Kirbot's foot dipped into the water a few times, then when they were 3/4 there, Kirbot just made a rocket jump high enough for them to float down but still have Cwis hover up a little.

When they were above land, Cwis dropped Kirbot on the ground and collapsed. Kirbot went into the bag and but the inhaler to Cwis's mouth, where he breathed deep. He was sweating like crazy with the fire ability's heat. "F***....so....f***ing...hot..." Cwis panted. The two were the first to make it with their haste, and they both sat, took a break, and watched for the rest of their group on the bottom stairs. The fire hat serving as a beacon.

((Long post #2...think I can get a combo going?))
((EDIT: Just remembered the crushers, so I added that in.))

[Aki]

Ah. Ahhh. What a difficult looking obstacle course. Geez, maybe it might be easier to do this with a partner. Let's see, partner, partner... partner? Maggie's eyes flickered to a smooth halt when she spotted Kent. He seemed a little dazed, perhaps from the flash of her camera. Ah, well. Most of the other participants had gone on ahead, and he seemed like the most able bodied man amongst those remaining, if only because of his heavy armor, soooo...

"You! You're, like, totally coming with me~" she said cheerfully, seizing the knight by the arm and dragging him along. She dragged him along easily enough until she ran into something that forced the two of them to a grinding halt. The impact jostled the knight's arm free from Maggie's grip, and Maggie herself tumbled for a moment or two before falling over on her backside. "Ow, ow... what gives?" she muttered, irritated. She fumbled around and then gripped her glasses. She popped them back onto her face and actually saw what was blocking their passage.

Shooting straight up into the air like an oppressive, multicolored, polka-dotted obelisk was a giant tie. Fifteen feet up, a large hole had been cut into the tie.

The hole was on fire.

Upon closer inspection, she could see that the hole was, in fact, not on fire. The hole itself was just a hole. There was a ring inside the hole that just so happened to be the same size as the hole, however. The ring itself was what was on fire.

Maggie thought about how she was going to bypass the ring for about a second and then flashed a grin. "This is, like, totally easy," she grinned, aiming her camera at the ring. She held it steady, taking a moment to lock onto the ring. She pressed the button.

It happened slowly at first, as if the ring did not quite realize what was happening to it. Bits and pieces of it seemed to glow and then fade, and its shape slowly became distorted. Then, suddenly, its entire figure turned into a bright yellow silhouette of light, going from menacing ring of fire into not-so-menacing blob of light in an instant. The silhouette was converted into particles of light and were quickly absorbed into Maggie's camera.

She grinned, satisfied, hands on her hips. "Now it's your turn," she said, giving the knight a hearty pat on the back. "How are we going to get through that hole? You gonna toss me through? It's pretty high up, though, and you won't be able to get by if you do that. I don't wanna be losing a potential asset so early, so- Hey, almost forgot, like, what's your name? I'm Maggie. Maggie Zene. Like, with a Z. Zzzz. Zene. Cool name, huh? Is your name cool? What is it? I'm curious~"

[Rick]

LUK looked over the strange being before him, as if considering things.

>Running internal debate...
>Unite with the catman.

"Yes," he said aloud, "I would like that very much indeed." And then Tielord appeared, creating their first task. LUK was still for a bit as several others proceeded ahead, plotting out a course of action.

>First obstacle: scale 15 feet and make it through a flaming ring.
>Considering possible solutions...
>Running Dice Roller.exe...
>Result is 12.
>Activating Effect #12: "Argh".
>Activated.
>Running Vocalizer...

((VIKING BATTLECRY))

"SPLIT YOUR LUNGS WITH BLOOD AND THUNDER!" LUK roared, stomping forward, then tipping his head back with his hands taking on a manic gesture. "IT BEGINS! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAARGH!". His shouting at least broke the concentration of some others, but it didn't solve the problem at hand. He was immediately calm again.

>Progress Report: Fuck all happened, cap'n.
>Running Dice Roller.exe...
>Result is 5. Performing Secondary Roll...
>Result is 3.

((No Sonic Boom...))

>Activating Effect #5: "Echo-locate".
>Activated.

LUK's head opened up, and out of it rose a speaker with a very...hi-tech appearance, you could say. It promptly began to release high-pitched echoes. For the most part, this did nothing but let LUK know what he could already tell by just looking, but at least any bats or people with bat-like abilities or sonar-abilities would be fucked, however temporarily.

"This is not my day." LUK mused.

[William]

Kyuu stoke his human chin with his human hands, smirking. "Interesting... A nice first challenge. This should be interesting." He then faced LUK. "So, my friend, why don't you show me what you can do?"

Almost immediately, the robot started shouting. Kyuu just watched, in a mix of surprise and amusement, before following the robot as he walked forwards. Once he stopped, the cat-turned-man said "That was lovely, just the spirit I like to see. But, do you have any ideas on how to make it through? I bet I could reach up there, but I-- What does that speaker-- MEOW!!" Kyuu flinched, slipping and falling on his side, hands to his ears, as the speaker started emitting the low echo. His sensitive cat ears could hear them, and it hurt. He curled up into a ball, and slowly melted away, becoming a deformed mass of black goo.

After the sound was over, the goo shivered a little and produced a feline ear. It waited for a little longer before becoming Kyuu's usual anthro-cat form. He looked up to LUK, with a displeased face, and mumbled "So much for my cover, nya." He crossed his tiny arms and tapped a finger against his arm, thoughtfully looking at the gigantic tie. "Okay, nya, I got it."

Instantaneously, his body became that of an incredibly muscular man. "HRAAAA", he shouted, rushing towards the wall. He punched through the wall and quickly jumped through the hole, shouting "OH NYEEEEEEAH" as he did so. He turned around, and smiled. "Now, my friend! Let's quickly proceed--" He was interrupted by the wall starting to regenerate. "Oh my, it regenerates! Fast, robotic friend, jump through! Tap my back once you have passed!" He stomped on the lower part with both feet, and held the top with both hands.
"GRAAAAAGGHH", he shouted, as his body changed again; he became an 8 feet tall through 5 feet wide... muscle door. Technically, it was just a portal, no door per se. He didn't have eyes; he became a simple muscular mass, so anyone could just pass through.

((I made it easy for everyone. Unless Rick posts first or something.))

[Xartarin]

"NNGHAAAH!" Sigurd yelled, covering his ears and grunting in pain. Unfortunately for him, Sigurd had good hearing and was sensitive to extremely loud and piercing noises, like the roar of the Swamp Damgra, or bad opera. Luckily there was no sonic boom, so Sigurd was able to recover fast enough to see that there was some weird muscle door in front of him.

"My thanks!" He yelled to the muscle door as he leaped through it, along with all the other participants in that hallway taking advantage of an easy challenge bypass. However, Sigurd then met with the next challenge: A line in front of the tightrope. Only one person could pass at a time.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The grappling hook was cooled off now. Casey looked up, and saw the fire ring was missing. A couple more people were using this opportunity to easily overcome the first wall. Deciding not to get swept up by the crowd, Casey retracted her fan and quickly started progressing across the monkey bars.

The rest of the challenge was fairly easy. Casey balanced across the balance beam, while HAL used his robotic hand pressed up against the low ceiling of that part to stabilize her. The monkey bars were even easier.

Other participants were passing Casey by the time she reached the monkey bars. However, they weren't very challenging, and she easily used her grappling hook to lower herself down the other side. And then....

SMASHSMASHMASHSHMASHSHMASH

"Oh jeez..." Casey moaned, watching some participants get their legs broken by the crushers. Just as they got their heads smashed, they burst into an assortment of ties, lying on the ground in a shape reminiscent of a chalk outline.

((Not all floors need people exploding into stuff, you can have plain ol' dead bodies.))

[Star Kirby]

It certainly was the most...interesting obstacle course Kent had ever seen, for a lack of better words. He had time to give it a quick scan before someone grabbed his arm. He yelped in surprise, scrambling to get his footing before the other person could drag him down or something. "M-miss?! E-excuse me what are you doi-" Before Kent could finish his sentence, he and the girl tripped, tumbling down ungracefully. "A-ah, I'm sorry..." He trailed off again as the girl snapped the camera at the ring of fire, and suddenly the fire vanished, leaving an ordinary hole in a tie. That's amazing! I didn't know that something could do that! How many years in the future is this anyway?

Kent stumbled forward again as the girl slapped him on the back while grinning, and introduced herself as Maggie. "I, uh, I'm Hent Karken. I-I mean Kent Harken!' he stuttered, rubbing the back of his head.

Introductions over, Kent was glad to get away from the girl, but apparently she was assuming that they would help each other out. He turned to the concrete tie, pulling out his sword, and started digging footholds into it. They weren't very deep, but it should've been relatively easy to climb into the hole and drop to the other side.

[Rick]

LUK sprinted through the muscle door, and then made sure to tap it to let Kyuu know he was through. Some other competitors had used the opening as well, but that was no problem to him right now.

>Next obstacle is a tightrope.
>Current task: Plot a course of action to safely traverse pit...
>Activating Scanner...

LUK scanned the tightrope of ties, creating notes in his database. Summarised: he discovered the ties were comprised of an alloy known as Tietanium, not naturally of this world. It was decently tough, and could make for a decent material to patch wounds in his armourskin with, should he collect any samples.

The tightrope bridge was deemed too flimsy to safely cross by himself. There was only one option left...

>Running Dice Roller.exe...
>Result is 1.

((OH SHIT SON))
((I rolled again to determine if it was fatal (10 or more, he lived; result was 14. This is the only time I'll do this; next time he dies if possible.))

>WARNING: EFFECT #1 ENGAGED.
>CRITICAL FAILURE ENSURED.
>BRACE FOR IMPACT.

LUK immediately dashed forward with reckless abandon, almost certain his journey was at an end. But the dicelords of the past smiled upon him, and he tripped as he approached the tie tightrope. Unfortunately, this fall dealt some considerable damage to him; his Treasure Hoard, Scanner and Database had been temporarily disabled, as had his arm and chest weaponry.

((All of the above disabled for my next three posts.))

"It seems I was ill-equipped for this mission..." he said dejectedly, staring mournfully (the way only robots could) across the tightrope bridge.

[Chocolate Kirby]

Now that Cwis was calmed down and ready, he got up. "Where are YOU going?" Kirbot asked, almost like a mom to a kid that was grounded.
"Onto the next floor! My body is ready! We can set sail! Move on! Locomote! Relo-"
"Okay, be quiet and sit back down. We should wait for the rest of our group."
"Come on, it's an all for one thing! we might as well get moving!"
"Well, I'm not moving." Kirbot said stubbornly.
"Oh come on! You know that I can't leave you hear in this...place. It's weird enough that the floor feels like pants. And besides, you have the d*** virus on ya! Speaking of that, can you feel it yet?"
Kirbot moved his limbs. "No, everything's operating fine."

A guy from another group was fast approaching. Cwis was amused as he lost his shoe in the crushers, but then he was sour again as the guy was charging hungrily for the stairs. Cwis looked pleadingly at Kirbot, who showed no sympathy. As the guy ran by, Cwis blew an ember at the guy. His pants caught fire at the first step and he frantically took of his hat and waved it at the fire, putting it out. He looked at the scorch marks on the but of his pants and hat before giving Cwis a death stare and flipping him off. Then running up the stairs again.

Cwis plopped back down with his usual "I hate everything" expression. Then he scavengered into ???'s backpack (Cwis didn't know why he still claimed the backpack belonged to that dead a**) and pulled out a bagel and cream cheese, throwing it in his mouth and making a chewing motion angerly before swallowing.

"I bet the 2nd floor is a lot more interesting than this one." Cwis muttered as more people emerged from the wall.

((Filler post! Probably no more posts until everyone reaches the end of the obstacles.))
((Yeah, I'm regretting doing it all in one post. SUE ME (ON THE 2ND FLOOR!)))

[Aki]

It wasn't until Kent had crawled his way maybe halfway up the tie, when...

"Hey, like, wait a sec!" exclaimed Maggie, the realization hitting her like a block of cement to the face. "Why did I just eliminate the ring of fire when I could have gotten rid of..." She stepped backward, camera trained at the huge tie that stood in their way. She oriented the camera vertically so as to get a better view, to include the entire figure in her camera's scope. "The whole thing?"

It would have helped for her to realize this sooner, though.

"And there, like, done!" she said, pleased with her work. Suddenly, the huge tie became basked in a light similar to the light that had enveloped the ring of fire, causing it to vanish.

With Kent still climbing it.

With his footholds suddenly reduced to particles of light, the knight immediately succumbed to gravity, his heavy armor dragging him down. Maggie winced at the damage that she had inadvertently wrought. Well, he wasn't that high up, so he probably wouldn't die from a fall like that... come to think of it, his heavy armor might break his fall... or maybe just his back.

"Like, yeesh. That's totally got to hurt."

[Xartarin]

"NOW!" Yelled HAL. HAL was computing the best path through the crushers, and yelling "NOW!" every time Casey needed to jump. It was working perfectly, and Casey exited unharmed. Finally, Casey proceeded to the final challenge on that floor. A pool.

"Let me guess," Casey said, "You're not waterproof, right?"

"No, sorry Casey," HAL said. Casey had to scratch her chin and think for a bit, sitting down. Other participants were passing her, jumping into the pool and swimming across. Casey thought for a bit.

Casey fired her trusty grappling hook at the ceiling, which managed to embed itself a little. She took off the backpack and swung it at the other side of the pool. HAL then dislodged the grappling hook and fell safely at the other side of the pool. Casey dived into the pool with her baseball bat in her mouth and swam to the other side of the pool.

When she emerged on the other side, HAL was gone. Exiting to the second floor, some man wrapped in desert-style robes had stolen the robot! "HEY! Give that BACK!" Casey yelled, and chased the mysterious thief to the second floor.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Finally reaching his turn, Sigurd walked easily across the tightrope. This group is pretty courteous, Sigurd thought. Apparently, at this point no one really considered each other competitors, just people who might potentially fall into traps instead of them.

The rest of the challenges were fairly easy for Sigurd. Rock climbing, monkey bars, swimming. The main problem was the crushers. Luckily, some brute in the group had destroyed all of them before Sigurd even got there. Apparently, they didn't regenerate like the big tie at the beginning.

"Well, it will only get harder from here," Sigurd said as he was wringing out his mummy wraps, trying to dry himself off a bit before proceeding to the next level.

[Star Kirby]

One moment, Kent had been steadily climbing up the tie, courtesy of the footholds he had thought to dig in, the next moment...

"AUUUUUUGH!!!" he yelped as the tie suddenly vanished from under him. Gravity kicked in and he tumbled to the ground ungracefully, landing hard on his back with an unpleasant sound somewhat like a mix between a thump and a crack. Luckily, he had only just started climbing and wasn't more than four feet above the ground at the time, although it still hurt like hell and left Kent quite disoriented. He decided not to move until the world stopped spinning and he could make sure he wasn't blind or something like that.

A few minutes later, Kent sat up, rubbing his head. "M-miss, please give me a little warning next time before doing...whatever you did..."

That being said, it was very much convenient that the giant tie was gone, and participants could simply walk past, which is what Kent did. He wasn't sure whether he should be waiting for Maggie, but he assumed she would be following close behind.