hm...i don't see anyone starting any new fanfics..^^...so i'll just post my 'oneshot'...actually..there's a sequel...but i don't know if i want to write it or not...i need some time to think it through for the sequel...so for now...let's just pretend...that there is no sequel....or maybe there isn't? i don't know..enjoy this...:D


written on January 5th, 2008


It was a regular boring Monday morning at the company when he walked in and I saw his dazzling smile. I have worked here for well over a year now, but I have never seen anyone so handsome yet sweet and well-mannered walk into the cubicle I was stationed in.
“I’m sorry, ma’am, do you by any chance know where the main conference room is located?” He looked at me with such beautiful eyes I almost choked up on what I was trying to say.
“Um…you take a right down the hall, past the vending machines, make a left and it’s the second door on your right. Room # 101.” I avoided eye contact with men like these hovering around my cubicle because all they were was trouble to come.
“Oh…okay…thank you…uh…Miss…?” He looked at me like he wanted to know my name but his friends interrupted.
“Ryu, forget it. Hurry up before the manager yells at us for being late. It is our first day.” Two of his five friends dragged the man named Ryu away. I watched them walk away and turn right the way I had told them. Man, I should’ve lied to them and made them take the wrong way. Naw, forget it. I’d get scolded by the manager.


I was doing the usual jobs I did in the company: filing papers, working on the database, making copies for the top dogs of the company, and basically any other dirty work that no one wanted to do. How fun is this job, eh? But then, while I was doing these boring jobs I saw him again. He was with one of his friends and the manager, walking towards me. I was about to turn away when the manager motioned me to come to them. I was hesitating but then, come on; it was the manager, so I went.
“Ryu, Kihyun, meet one of our…uh…directors of the company. She is a really smart and talented young woman. Miss Jang please meet Battle’s leader and one of the two rappers, Won Seung Jae or Ryu and Shin Kihyun, who was a rapper during the show but is now a vocalist in the group.”
“Hello Ryu, Kihyun. We’re all excited to have you and your group join this company.”
“Thank you, again. We’re really glad to be here.”
“Again?” The manager looked at me. Ryu smiled at me but I turned away and looked at my watch.
“Oh, it’s time for me to, uh, get some paper filed. See you guys around.” Before my uncle or any of them could say anything else, I walked away. Yes, the manager is none other than my uncle. And I’m a big fat liar. I secretly hide my identity because my uncle thinks I am not good enough to do the things he does, in which, I think I am fairly good at. So he lies to new people in the company that I am the director however I am just but another employee to his company. It’s just not my time to shine yet. Oh how many times I tell myself that every single day.



I turned the corner as fast as my feet would let me. I then arrived at my office and sat down in the squeaky chair. Why did I just lie? I don’t lie, especially around newbies like them. Ha. Newbies. Why does thinking about them make me not want to laugh? I spun myself around to my laptop and started typing.

“Dear Journal,
Why am I feeling this way today? I don’t usually feel this…jumpy and out of words. Wait. I lied. I hardly talk but taken into consideration that, come on, it is me. I don’t like men. All men are the same, right? Then how come I feel a different aura with Ryu?”

“Wait, I don’t even have a journal! Why suddenly write in one today?” I deleted what I wrote and closed my laptop. I think I just need to run down to the vending machine and grab a soda. Wait. I ‘quit.’ Water, right. I walked to the vending machine and saw a member of Ryu’s group there.
“Hi, I’m Chris. What’s your name?” I looked around and pointed at myself.
“You talking to me?” The guy named Chris laughed.
“Yeah.” I looked at him and gave a small smile.
“Oh…hi, my name’s Claire Jang. I’m a, uh, an employee here.” Ugh. Stupid, no duh I’m an employee here. He laughed at me once more.
“Yes…I can see. Well, nice meeting you, Claire. Bye.” While Chris was walking back wherever he came from I took out my side bag and grabbed a dollar. Hmm…water it is then. I grabbed my water and went back to my lovely cubicle.

--------------------------

“Yah, Ryu, her name’s Claire.” Chris sat down next to Hwichan and laughed.
“What? I didn’t ask for her name. Why? Did you see her?” Ryu asked Chris and he burst into laughter again.
“Why?” Chris asked. Ryu looked down and walked to the fridge.
“What? I didn’t say anything. Nothing. I don’t care.” Lio walked up to Ryu.
“You sure about that buddy? I mean…” Lio then walked away from Ryu and shrugged. “Never mind. If you say it’s nothing, it’s nothing. Everything’s cool.”
“Yeah…nothing.” Chris smiled.
“Chris…be quiet. I think that’s enough talking for one day. Ha ha.” Chris rolled his eyes at Lio and started another conversation with Hwichan and Taehwa.

“Ryu, don’t listen to them. They’re just…uh…what’s that word…” Kihyun walked up to Ryu.
“It’s nothing. Just like I said.”
“Okay.” Kihyun gave Ryu a pat on the back and went out the door. “Time to crash guys.” The rest of the guys followed Kihyun but Ryu stayed back for a little while. He went to sit in the recliner against the wall where no one could really see that there was a person sitting there. And that was what happened to me when I went in the room. Inside the lounge, there were always better snacks than in the cafeteria so I went in and dug for some snacks.
“Hi.” I dropped the snacks I was jumbling in my arms and stood there frozen like a dummy. I slowly turned around and saw that it was only Ryu.
“Oh…you...” I bent to pick up my snacks and looked at him and gave a little smile. “Ha…pretend you never saw anything, or else my uncle’ll yell at me, alright?” Ryu looked at me with a weird look.
“Your uncle? I don’t know your uncle. Is he…?” I opened my eyes wide.
“Oh…um…never mind. My uncle use to work here and, uh, you know, I was used to him around here and…stuff…okay…bye.” I stuffed the snacks into my bag and walked out. But before I could walk out he tapped my shoulder.
“Uh, your name’s Claire right?” I looked at him and nodded. “Well, I just wanted to thank you once again face to face. So, thank you.”
“Oh…it’s cool. It’s my job you know. Alright, see you later.” I took a step forward but stopped. “Um…do you mind letting go of my wrist?” Ryu let go and I thought I saw him blush but it was probably a mistake.
“Oops, sorry. I, uh, forgot. Bye.” He walked away at a fast pace. I gave a deep sigh and smiled. Finally a good enough reason to come to work here. Or so I thought.


It was already dark and I knew that everyone would soon be leaving. I was glad. I was always glad. Because then, when everyone left, I could go into the studio and listen to the artists and their songs. I loved hanging out in the studio. Only the important people like the manager, producers and stuff could go in. As for me, if my uncle found out I have been going in the studio for the past 6 months, he’d sure fire me. And that’s why I carefully make sure everyone leaves so I don’t get caught. As I saw the front company door close and lock I closed the lights in the room where my office was at and walked to the studio. My uncle always left at 10 p.m. sharp and now was 2 a.m. So I was really sure no one was here. The janitors didn’t go home until 4 or so but then they never told on me. Or so I hope so.
I walked into the studio and went straight into the recording room. I loved being in there because it made me feel like I was special and had some talent. I ran into the other room and put on one of my favorite song by I the Tri Top: Calling Love and ran back into the recording room. I positioned the headphones on my ears and put on the mike. I started to sing and it felt great. What I didn’t know was that Ryu was in the other room recording me sing. I didn’t know because I had my eyes closed but when I finished and opened my eyes I almost fainted. My face became so hot and red I was getting a bit dizzy.
Ryu opened the door and walked up to me.
“You know, your voice…it has a really nice tone to it…I like it. Haha…So what are you doing here, huh? Are you even allowed in here?...” I suddenly felt better now.
“Haha…please don’t tell anyone I was in here. My un-…I mean, the manager will definitely fire me if he knew I was in here. Please…” I clamped my hands together and begged him.
“Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me. However, you have to do a favor for me.” Ryu looked at me with a big smile. Should I or should I not? Well, let’s just take a little risk, I guess, since my life is dull anyway. I looked up at him and held my hand out.
“Okay.” We shook hands. “What is it?”
“Just follow me.” He took my hand and took me back inside the recording room.
“What are we doing here? I thought you said you had a favor for me to do? Come on, just tell me.”
“This is the favor. I would like for you to sing a…duet with me. Okay?” I looked down and looked back up.
“Are you making fun of me? Cus if you are I-…”
“No, I’m definitely not. I just…want you to sing with me okay?” I didn’t know if this was such a good idea after all. But after 5 minutes of thinking I went with his ‘favor.’ “Okay, just stand here. I’ll be right back.” Ryu went back to the room and then came back. A minute later I heard a song go on.
“Sing with me?” Ryu grabbed my hands and held them in the palm of his.
“Fine, only this once.” Why did Ryu holding my hands at this moment feel so good? I looked at him and he motioned to me that the song was starting.

When the song finished I took off the headphones and stood there.
“Well…that was fun, but I have to go now. Bye.” Without waiting for his reply I walked out. I didn’t want him to think anything into it. But at that same moment I also laughed at myself. He doesn’t or wouldn’t like me. I’m just an ordinary chick who works in a damn box. I went into my office, grabbed my bag and ran out of the building. I felt an urge to wait and see if he would follow me, but then, I guess I put too much thought into us singing together. How lame am I?

--------------------------------------------

Ryu stood at the door and laughed at himself. “Wow, that was awkward.” He turned the recording room light off and went inside the studio. He played back the duet and smiled. He knew it was good. He was going to treasure that moment forever.


For the next couple of weeks, I didn’t see Ryu or the group much. I wanted to see him but I guess he was busy with being new and all. And why all of a sudden do I care? I took a deep sigh and rubbed my head. I asked myself if I should put any thought into what happened a couple week nights ago. I looked at my laptop and at the keyboard. Why do I feel sad? Why do I feel like my world is going to collapse? I stood up to go to the cafeteria.
“Hey Claire.” I turned around and saw Ryu. I guess I was that happy to see him because he gave me a hug. No, I’m just kidding. I wished it was what happened.
“I was wondering when I would see you again. Here. *He hands me a CD* It’s the recording of your singing and our duet. You should listen to it. It’s great. Well, I have to go so I’ll catch up with you later.” Ryu walked out of the cafeteria and left me there, staring at where he was just a few seconds ago. So, I guess I know my answer now, right? He doesn’t like me. So I can finally move on. I give a sigh of relief to myself but I don’t understand why I did. I know deep down inside I feel hurt. But come on! I don’t even know this guy. I walk out of the cafeteria and walk up the stairs. I’ve decided to go up to the balcony. Maybe a hint of fresh air will clear my mind. What I didn’t expect was Hwichan and Kihyun up on top already.
“Hey, Claire. Beautiful day isn’t it?” Kihyun walked up to me and gave me a big hug. He was one of the only members of the group other than Hwichan that I felt comfortable talking to. Then Hwichan hugged me afterwards.
“Hey Kihyun, Hwichan. What are you guys doing up here? Don’t you guys have to practice or do something more important than being up here?” I gave them a smile but they only responded with a nod.
“Claire, we’re going to be leaving tomorrow. We are going on tour and…well…we won’t be coming back until a year or so. I don’t even know if we’re going to have time to visit the company.” I looked at them and gave a sigh.
“Oh…well…it’s okay. I can always email you guys. I hope you guys have fun, alright? Should I give you guys gifts?” I pretend to think about it and take a step back. “Yeah, I’ll just go shopping right now.” I take more steps back and start to leave.
“Claire, stop. We know how you feel about Ryu, okay. Just tell him before he leaves. I think maybe he’d like to know.” Hwichan came up to me and lifted my chin up. “Come on, just tell him. If you don’t, you’ll regret it.” He gave me a hug and left. Kihyun came up to me and gave me another hug.
“I don’t know. But, if you really like Ryu, you should tell him. Bye. We’ll see you in the near future.” Kihyun gave me one last hug and took off. I walked to the edge of the balcony and sat there, just thinking. I don’t know what to do.

----------------------------------------

They are leaving in an hour. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know if I should tell Ryu. I’m scared to tell him and then he’d reject me. I’m scared that if I tell him I love him, I actually don’t. I’m scared of being scared. I look at myself in the bathroom mirror and sigh. What if he doesn’t like me? What if…? I don’t know if I should run to the airport and tell him I love him or should I text him or what? I’m going out of my mind right now. My heart is beating very fast. I run out of the bathroom and grab my bag from my desk. I’m going after him but since I can’t drive I’ll have to take the bus or the cab. How will I make it in time when the airport is 30 minutes away and I have to wait for a ride? I’m so confused and frustrated right now. I want to burst into tears. I don’t know if I should have made the decision to go after him.
Finally, after 20 minutes I see a cab. I jump into it and tell the cab driver to drive as fast as he could to the airport. During the whole ride, my heart felt like it was about to jump out. I’m crying very hard. I really want to see him one last time before he leaves.

I have ten minutes left but where is he? Where are you Ryu? I need to see you, one last time. I wipe away the new tears that are forming and stop in the middle of the crowd. I saw him. I saw Ryu. But why can’t I seem to move? I can’t move my legs. Why? I look at him to see if he notices me, but it seems as though he didn’t. I’m only a few hundred feet away. Why can’t he see me? I see him walk away and the door closes. I stand there, dumbfounded and start calling his name.
“R…yu…R…yu…Ryu….Ryu!” I call his name numerous times yet it seems he’s not coming back.





Ending Theme Song : I the Tri Tops – Calling Love

listen <sorry...i got lost on how to do the media thing?>

LYRICS TO THE SONG SO IT MAKES MORE SENSE:

I'm smiling like a fool
Even if it was sarcastically,
I should have said "let's not say those words"
Because it chokes me up

I'm crying like a little kid
I'm watching you turn around without any expression
Goodbye

Now my heart is exploding as I'm calling out for you
I'm calling out to you like crazy
Like the first snow fall that's melted, so has my love
Love you goodbye my love
I'm now calling out to you
The words I couldn't say, cause I love you

I just keep staring at the ground after hearing not to hold onto you
Hearing you say that it was hard for you hurts me that I can't hold these tears back

All that's left is the light that used to shine down on you
I couldn't even hold onto the shadow that looked like you
Goodbye

Now my heart is exploding as I'm calling out for you
I'm calling out to you like crazy
Like the first snow fall that's melted, so has my love
Love you goodbye my love
I'm now calling out to you
The words I couldn't say, cause I love you

If you turned around just once I'd go running to you and hold you
If you were to leave taking each step slowly then I wouldn't let you go

Now I'm calling out to you til my throat becomes hoarse
So that you can hear me wherever you are in this world
Your name I loved to death
Love you, goodbye my love
I'm now calling out to you
The words I wanted to say

Now my heart is exploding as I'm calling out for you
I'm calling out to you like crazy
Like the first snow fall that's melted, so has my love
Love you goodbye my love
I'm now calling out to you
The words I couldn't say, cause I love you