shuld win all tidalz!!1
Member No.: 166
Joined: 11-June 10
Here's a sample I did for one of my other characters. I've never RPed as Josh Graham.
[An silent, black and white newsreel begins to play.]
TITLE: NEWS ON THE MARCH!
[Jaunty piano music plays over grainy footage of people gathered at a dock]
TITLE: FANS GATHER TO SEE OFF WRESTLING STAR!
[Thaddeus Walker stands on the deck of a Tramp Steamer, dressed in a suit and wide brimmed hat. He waves as streamers pour down on him.]
TITLE: THADDEUS WALKER DEPARTS FOR CALIFORNIA!
[Thaddeus, now shirtless, stands in his boxing pose as old timey reporters take pictures]
TITLE: THADDEUS WALKER PREPARES FOR BOUT AT RIOT IN WHICH HE SHALL GIVE TWO SCOUNDRELS THEIR COMEUPPANCE!
[Thaddeus now kneels on the deck and offers his pipe to a small child, who happily takes a puff. Thaddeus rubs the kid's head, then looks at the camera and smiles]
TITLE: FANS WISH GOOD LUCK TO THE TRUE GENTLEMAN OF GRAPPLING!
PRESENTED BY DOC JOHNSON'S MUSTACHE WAX!
IF IT AIN'T DOC JOHNSON'S, IT'S FOR THE IRISH!
[Later, in his room aboard the Tramp Steamer, Thaddeus Walker sits down at a small desk. He takes a pen to a sheet of paper, and begins to compose a letter.]
3 May, 1920
Once again, I find myself venturing to unknown territories. With my success in cWo in hand, I am venturing to EPW, which is in California Territory. While I do wish I could take a break, wrestling is my business. I know we have not been together for 7 years, but this is the life that the Champion of All Wrestling Territories must live. I believe fortune awaits me in California, both in the ring and under it. Several speculators have told me of a fortune that lies directly under the EPW ring. Whether this fortune is gold or oil remains to be seen, but luckily both are my businesses. I will send a small stipend back for you to purchase more cleaning supplies and perhaps a new frock. However, priorities such as travel and tobacco will be in the forefront of my mind. Sadly, due to the nature of fuel on this vessel, tobacco is not allowed. Oh how I yearn to take a stiff fag in my mouth at journey's end!
My voyage has been pleasant, to say the least. The sailors are a merry lot, and I enjoy their company. The cook, a chinee, makes up for his lack of humanity with the ability to concoct several scrumptious dishes. Even the negro, usually the most devious of all lesser creatures, is of good nature when he comes to change my toilet pan. My voyage will span several more days as I travel out Californee Way. Several of EPW's staff implored me to take a faster route, whether by train of even by that new fangled Aeroplane. But, my dear, you know your husband to be a simple man. I crave not the luxuries of the railroad, but rather the solitude of the open sea. This particular steam ship is fueled by cow pies, which, I learned, are Shipped High In Transit... leading the sailors to create quite a colorful phrase for them, one I dare not insult your feminine delicacies by repeating! I dare say that if not for our government's prohibition of The Devil's Tonic, my trip would not be nearly as pleasant, as the sailors would not be as sound of body and mind.
On this voyage, I find my thoughts drifting to our son, T.J. Walker. I receive constant reports from his tutors at the Manningham Home For Boys, where I hear academically, he is towards the top of his class. Recently, he scuffled with a fellow lad, an Irish, which makes me worry about the standards at Manningham. Perhaps you would call on the headmaster. I know that T.J's nature is not a devious one, but the Irish are heathens and love nothing more than to tempt our white christian son into temptation. The five dollars I send them a month for T.J's education should go towards keeping him away from the impure, and if they cannot expunge the Irish from their ranks, then perhaps it is time we school our son elsewhere! Perhaps I will send for him, but I don't know if the lad has the fortitude to be a wrestling man like his father. His tutors tell me that even at age 14, T.J's moustache has not fully grown in. I myself, as you very well know, had an exquisite moustache at the tender young age of 4, and the current moustache I wear was in it's full glory when I was T.J's age. Perhaps there was a failure on your end. I know we hoped to make him a full blooded Walker, but I fear that your father's cowardly Mitchell traits have found their way into his heart. When I return, I expect you to produce me a son of heartier stock, who we shall call W.T Walker. Perhaps he may grow a proper moustache, one to rival his father's, which is so majestic in form I dare say I have considered referring to it as "His excellency."
I dare say, I enjoy this departure from cWo. The organization has been so badly infiltrated by Jews that I scarcely can identify it as a wrestling territory. Because of the Jewish influence, devious colored gents are allowed in the same ring as real human beings. I have, however, spotted another black mark of cWo in EPW... one of the territory's devious Irishmen has found his way here. Hopefully our paths do not cross, or he will take the trashing of a life time! On the subject of Jews, I know you have read Mr. Ford's piece on them, but there is a fellow in Germany who I have been told has some bang up ideas! I digress.
For my debut in EPW, I stand to face not one but two other competitors. Obviously, the ingenious new form of match which I have invented, the "Three Gentlemen In The Ring At The Same Time" match, has spread from cWo to the farthest corners of the territories! I know very little of my opponents other than they are both white men, which is agreeable. Of these men, there are two possibilities. First, is that they are naked faces. If this is the case, then how can they call themselves true gentlemen, walking around with their naked upper lips exposed for all the world to see? Obscene! I do hope, however, they they are real men and have covered their lips in the hairy blessing of Our Lord. While their facial hair is without a doubt inferior to His Excellency, I look forward to adding it to my collection!
[Thaddeus gets up and walks away from the table. He opens up his Attache case and pulls out a big, leather covered book labeled "Beards of the vanquished." He flips through the pages, each of which contain in-tact beards mounted on thick paper. He smiles as he comes across two empty pages. He leaves the book open, then goes back to his letter.]
I shall take their beards, rip them from the faces of these two scoundrels with every ounce of hatred in my body. How shall I do this? Quite simple.. by using my endless repertoire of grappling holds! Wonderful news! When practicing on some of the lads who tend the ship, I invented a new maneuver! In this maneuver, I wrap my opponents leg around my own and twist. I have decided to name it the Leg-Lock, and I pity the poor soul who must face it! I have also created a new sort of move in which I toss a gentlemen into the ropes, and when he bounces back towards me, I propel him several feet in the air until he crashes down behind me!
I look forward, my dear, to once again seeing my dear friend CB Fowler. While I have chosen to take the Tramp Steamer, CB was enticed by new technologies and chose to travel to California by Railroad. I hope that the inferior design abilities and technology of the Orientals who laid the rails holds during my friend's journey, and I see him safely in California territory. I yearn to take my friend in a deep embrace, to entwine our bodies in friendship, for we share a relationship which only men can: friendship. The 3 days in which CB and I haven't seen each other almost feels as long as the 7 years in which you and I have been apart.
I must also deliver a sad bit of news- our dog has perished. While on Safari, I found myself quickly surrounded by three lions, all of which clearly had not eaten in several days, making them quite irritable. I was able to fight two off using only my moustache comb and my right fist, but the third one, the male, was quite strong. It was then at our noble beast sprung to action, and and was able to fight off the lion, as well as the negro who attempted to tend to my wounds- no doubt to lure me into a false sense of security while he pilfered the contents of my pockets! Our dog unfortunately perished shortly afterwards, when, in a morphine induced haze, I believed him to be The Kaiser trying to lick off my moustache, and pummeled him to death. I have had the remains taxidermied, and they shall find their way to you soon.
I hope this letter finds you well. Please hold me in your thoughts, and wish for my continued success in the Wrestling business. News of my conquests and fortunes should have reached you prior to this letter.
Please take no other man in your bed.