Premiere Wrestling Alliance -> How to defeat a dragon

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How to defeat a dragon

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PrincessPortia	Posted: Oct 26 2009, 01:14 PM
Curtain Jerker Group: Members Posts: 9 Member No.: 151 Joined: 14-October 09	Hey guys, I know it was short, but can I get some feedback on the RP. I'm trying out something new with the objective third person narration and pseudo novel storytelling.

Keeton	Posted: Oct 26 2009, 05:00 PM
One Man Revolution Group: Members Posts: 629 Member No.: 49 Joined: 1-November 07	It was entertaining and I smiled picturing it in my head, but... I hated the mixture of script and novel style. It needs to be one or the other, the excessive use of exclamation points also bugged me. That reminded me a lot of Bob(Freddy Fandango). -------------------- PWA World Heavyweight Champion- [6/25/09-Current] Overall PWA Record: 29-12-6 as of 10/4/09 Former PWA World Light Heavyweight Champion[Never lost title.] Former PWA Tag Team Champion w/ Ryan Shane[Never lost titles.] 2008 PWA Tag Team of the Year w/ Ryan Shane

Ryan Shane

Posted: Oct 26 2009, 05:37 PM

"Right Now"

Group: Members
Posts: 466
Member No.: 55
Joined: 18-November 07

QUOTE (Keeton @ Oct 26 2009, 05:00 PM)

It was entertaining and I smiled picturing it in my head, but... I hated the mixture of script and novel style. It needs to be one or the other, the excessive use of exclamation points also bugged me. That reminded me a lot of Bob(Freddy Fandango).

I found it entertaining as well. Jake you are not the only one who was reminded of Bob. I thought it as soon as I saw the bio and example. Either way the character is different and interesting and I think I might read more. I knew it read weird at times but that didn't bother me.

--------------------

Record: 31-12 as of 11/1/09

Former Tag Team Champion with Jake Keeton (never lost the titles)

Former Premiere Champion (forfeited the title)

2008 Tag Team of the Year with Jake Keeton

Aiden Miles	Posted: Oct 26 2009, 10:20 PM
Negative Cunt Group: Members Posts: 1,069 Member No.: 25 Joined: 15-August 07	I believe I stated in her sample application that this could well be someone we know. If it is Bob, then I was right. If its not, very good roleplay nonetheless. I'm enjoying the character a lot, but the overuse of the !! irked me also. -------------------- 1x PWA Premiere Champion Former Member of The Brotherhood Project Catastrophe 1x TNW Franchise Champion (Last Ever) 1x TNW X Division Champion Former member of the Social Enemies

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