Supply drop in early pregnancy

Sorry for the anonymous post, but I'm sure you all understand why!

I'm barely 6 weeks pregnant, B"H, and still breastfeeding my toddler. My milk supply is really diminished, and it's starting to get sore, too.
DC is getting quite upset at the lack of milk, and is asking to nurse more often than before. In the night, comfort nursing is OK, but the rest of the time it is really frustrating the poor child.
If I weren't so sore, I wouldn't mind so much with repeated requests, even if it only results in a minute or two of suckling, but with us both unhappy with the situation, I need to change things.
I am not planning on tandem nursing - my specific situation makes this inadvisable. If the current situation results in total weaning, that's a good thing, but I want it to be as gentle as possible for DC.

Any suggestions on what to do, and how to explain what's going on to my toddler?

Thanks!

I weaned during early pregnancy with 3 of my kids. Just say "no more left". It may take a few days, but then they stopped asking. It was as if it never happened. Almost upsetting to me actually, how little they cared.

Doing that now, actually. We haven't nursed in maybe a week or so. He asks, I say "the milk is all gone! You are all done nursing. Let's have some oatmeal/juice/soup...instead." And he's usually pretty agreeable. In the beginning there were lots of tears and crying, so if I saw that he REALLY needed it I would nurse and say "let's count to ten and then we will be all done." And I did. He would cry again, usually. But sometimes it was enough. I found that ultimately, he wanted to nurse when he was tired. If I put him on my back, he would cry for a few minutes and then fall asleep. Now, of course, it's a bit trickier, because my belly is really much to big to wear him right now...so he's been cutting out naps altogether.

Anyways (((hugs))) and good luck and mazel tov on your pregnancy! Blessings for all that is good!

b'sha'a tova Jul511riv! Hope you are feeling good and that your ds accepts the weaning and goes back to napping! I have vivid memories of my oldest dropping her nap while I was pregnant with ds1 - it was so tough because I was so exhausted! We made a good use of "rest time" and special resting places (big cardboard moving box cut into a house shape, that I would encourage her to climb inside with blankets and pillows).
Anyway - sorry OP for hijacking your post, and b'sha'a tova to you! Sorry I don't have any advice for dealing with a reluctant weaner!

I have weaned my toddler (age 2) and it wasn't so simple, but it has happened. Like Julriv described, he still asks for it - that usually happens when he's tired (or in our case, in the early-morning, when he's still waking up) and I try to offer an alternative (in our case, a sip of seltzer or water that I keep near my bed). Sometimes it works, but not always. it sometimes means he's hungry - so then I get out of bed (sometimes much earlier than i'd like...ouch!) and give him breakfast. He usually doesn't ask again until the next morning.

This has been happening for over 2 weeks, since we fully weaned. he occasionally will ask more frequently, which is usually a sign of hunger or being tired.

I haven't experienced what LFE described - that after a few days they stop asking...my ds is still asking, 2+ weeks later, but I am distracting and offering alternatives, after reminding him that there's no more nursies.

Thanks for all the advice. Comforting to know that I'm not alone in struggling here.
Poor baby is still unhappy at the reduction in milk supply and the limits I'm putting on the nursing.
But, I'm being gentle but firm, using distraction whenever I can, and anticipating thirst/hunger. I'm also explaining that I have "ouchies" and counting down from 10 after a couple of minutes of nursing.

We shall see, but I'm hoping that we'll manage a gradual weaning that doesn't drag on too long. We aren't at the stage that I feel I can refuse all together, especially at night (we nurse once in the early hours and once when it's time to get up). I think those will be the last to go.

Thanks again everyone!

I'm currently 2 weeks behind you, and the thought of attempting to wean my toddler brings chills to my spine. The kid is a boob freak. Its not bad yet, and my supply is OK... FOR NOW.

I'm going to try to tandem nurse but if it gets bad, I may have to wean him.

In the third trimester here. I noticed recently that the discomfort of nursing is gone now... so if you can stick it through, at least that feeling goes away.

Thanks for sharing your experiences, everyone. B'shaa tova Megadociousrex!
We've progressed to only nursing once in the middle of the day, at bedtime and then once or twice in the early hours. I thought it would be harder to get to this stage, because dd was nursing so much, and so often, really recently. She asks more often, most days, but I can dissuade her and she doesn't cry. but she will ask repeatedly. Then again, if we are really busy, and out of the house a lot, she might not ask till the late afternoon. So, we are making progress, it's not easy, but I'm concerned about dropping the last daytime nursing all together because of how often she asks at the moment. Right now, between low supply and sore nipples, I know she's frustrated at how little she is getting, but that isn't enough for her not to bother!
How do I know when to stop nursing during the day? Any clues I can watch for to know that she won't be upset by it?

With Temima, after I cut out the nighttime nursings completely, she sort of just started asking less and less often, and by the end of pregnancy it was only every few days that she remembered to ask.

We've been stuck at the same stage for a couple of weeks now.
Nurse between 5 and 6am (if she nurses at 5ish, I can usually stall at 6ish and just get up with her for breakfast, although she doesn't like it).
Mid-morning she'll ask but I refuse, and then again in the early afternoon. She doesn't always ask to nurse during the day, but some days it starts right after carpool at around 9am and continues repeatedly. I offer snacks, drinks, hugs, stories, etc. Doesn't seem to be a consistent solution.
I nurse at bedtime (except when I have to get dh to do bedtime because I'm so exhausted/nauseous, in which case it takes them a long time to go to sleep).
If the nursing weren't causing cramps and nausea, then I wouldn't mind so much, and might be tempted to see how things went on their own. But, I'm feeling pretty crummy as it is, and can't see that it is in dd's best interest to push it.

I just weaned my ds2 (age 2) and it took many weeks before he stopped asking consistently. Just like your toddler, my son would persistently ask. It's been about 4 weeks now and we're tapering off - he only asks to nurse when he's tired or if something triggers his interest. He "gets over it" much quicker now too.

Sorry I dont have anything profound to tell you except "it get better."

Thanks for the reassurance, Chavi! My other weanings weren't like this at all.
Do you think it's OK to keep persevering and refusing to nurse during the day?
Yesterday I caved to nurse her down for her nap, because I had to go to an appt, and dh really needed her to be asleep so he could work (which he definitely couldn't do when she was cranky and overtired).
I'm tempted to just wear dresses, so that I can't be tempted to give in, and I could change into pjs and robe before I put her to bed (which I often do anyway, because I'm so tired by then!). Part of me worries that it would be cruel to do that, though, because I would be less likely to relax the "rule" and nurse her when she really needs it during the day. I'd be less responsive if it was harder to nurse.

Anonymous, you are doing this the hard way.

It is much easier on everyone to just end it. Wear dresses, say "no more left".

You think a toddler can keep track of when she can and when she can't nurse and why? Sometimes Mommy says yes, sometimes Mommy says no. That must be so confusing and frustrating. Once it's out of her life completely, it will be a lot easier to move on.

I agree. If you were consistently allowing her to nurse during the day but not at night, you could do it similarly (Nursing is not for nighttime, only when its bright) or "nursing is only for bedtime" - LFE is right in that the key is consistency. By nursing her sometimes, you're confusing her and she's not sure what the "rules" are.

One other way of doing it to limit the nursing and not ending it is to pick a specific location (i.e. the easy chair in your house, or the bed) and limit the nursing to that location only. Then say "we're only nursing in this spot" and keep reinforcing it.

But since you really want to completely stop all the nursing, as its not good for your specific situation, then I agree that "cut off completely - cold turkey" is probably the least-confusing way.

It's tough, I know. I had a few moments there where I was super-tempted to just give in, and nurse him "just this once" but I knew it would make the weaning all the more difficult in the long run - and once I had started, there was no going back (or rather, if I would go back, it would be for many more months, and not just for one or two nursing sessions).