Santa Clause

DD (3) is starting to notice lights, decorations, etc on people's houses... and I don't want her to be the Kill Joy for any Christian friends she may have in the future, but I certainly don't want her thinking Santa is real or she is somehow missing something because he's not gonna visit our house.

So those of you who've BTDT, what's your advice?

not sure if this makes any difference, but I grew up in a christian home and we never did Santa, neither did my husband's family. In fact I know a lot of Christians (a lot!) that don't do Santa. I never felt left out then and my kids don't feel left out now. It's always been a total non-issue for us. It's what some people do and we don't. It's all about how you spin in. Make a big deal out of Jewish Holidays and traditions and make some of your own family traditions too. We never had lights when I was a kid as a Christains, but now with Judaism we have snowflake lights on our house this winter. They have NOTHING to do with Christmas, Christians or anything religious... so we do them. My kids don't think anything of it. it's not a religious symbol, it's just a fun wintertime activity for us.

Everyone has to do what is comfortable for them in their communities of course... but if your family has a fulfilling Jewish life there should be little room left for worrying about what others do. I mean really, aside from even Shabbos, there are 10 times the amount of celebrations than Christians have. generally speaking they have Christmas and perhaps Easter. Talk about Christmas if she asks about it, and then move on. Acknowledge her questions, answer them and the change the subject to another happy one. If she sense your worrying about it she will too.

my dh is catholic (though goes to temple with us) and his family is very catholic. this conversation comes up every year. my 6yr old will shake hands with santa and then politely tell him that he is a jew. some santas just say happy holidays- we have had others that started to sing dreidel with him. my daughter is 3- she wants to sit on santa's lap because her friends do. she plans on telling him that we dont celebrate christmas but her friends do and she would like it if he would bring them what they want. for us- we let each child figure out how they are most comfortable

As someone who was raised in a religious Jewish home and raising my children similarly, it's very obvious that Christmas is not "our" holiday. But everywhere you go there are reminders of christmas - DS1 enjoys the pretty lights on some people's homes. DH and I both have similar approaches to this, and we have discussions about the fact that for many non-Jews, specifically christians, christmas is their special holiday. We don't denegrate it or their traditions. We simply state the facts. Then we usually move quickly to a discussion about all of OUR wonderful holidays, such as Pesach and Succot, and how every week we have shabbat.

When you're living in a society where you're in the minority, these discussions are bound to come up. We acknowledge that for the vast majority of those in our host culture, this is an important holiday, but this is not ours.

My mom used to tell us it was all for her birthday! She was born Christmas Day, for many years we believed her too!

With my own kids I joke its for grandma's birthday, but basically, tell them that it is a holiday non-Jews celebrate, and we have our own holidays. My kids have always been happy with that answer.

Out - it's my Mom's birthday too! We call it Shellymas

Dylan loves Christmas but he understands that it's not our holiday. We can appreciate the beauty of the lights and enjoy the traditions our friends hold dear but at the end of the day, it's just not our holiday.

On Saturday night - we went to the "dueling houses". Two home owners who try to outdo each other every year - I swear it looks like Christmas threw up on their front lawns! Well, the owners take turns and sit outside dressed as Santa.

Dylan went up to Santa (very excited but when he got close - he got a bit freaked out). Santa asked him what he wanted for Christmas and instead of either telling him what toys he likes or, preferably, that he's Jewish, he yelled out "I want a hot dog!"

Yes, this.

we just state it is not our minhag - end of story and living in ISrael we rarely have to deal with anything chrechtmas related except at sukkot when all the decorations are ..well....crechtmas decor imported from the EAST.

So one of my friends has cousins in Meah Shearim (ultra-ultra Orthodox neighborhood in Jerusalem). They went to visit on Succot, and were stunned to discover Santa decorations hanging in the succah.

They got up the courage to ask, "do you know who that is?"
The Meah Shearim kids answered, "of course we know who that is! It's the Roite Rebbe!"



but also (Roite means red in Yiddish).

Zeph, your post reminded me of this image, taken in Meah Shearim on Purim:

A Merry Purim to All