RX and Communication

Dear IP,

Our surrogate took morphine when pregnant with our child and miscarried shortly thereafter - she did not contact us before taking this drug - it was VERY early in the pregnancy - and the doctor could find no reason for the pain that she was experiencing.

Should this be a cause for concern moving forward? Is this something that you would do?

If you are a surrogate do you feel it is your body and you have all rights to do as you see fit during pregnancy without talking to IP's or doctor first? Is this something we should expect from any surrogate?

My question is Morphine considered safe while pregnant and did her doctor actually prescribe it as safe with the knowledge she was pregnant?

For me if it is medically prescribed AND (not or) 100% safe while pregnant I do not need to be notified BUT if it is not safe or not given by a doctor knowing there is a pregnancy then HELL NO! Don't even ask me!

If it was me and I had such big questions in my head I wouldn't move forward. Once trust is gone it is very hard to get back.

Sorry for your loss. :(

Morphine is a category C drug, not deemed safe in pregnancy. Did she disclose the pregnancy to the dr? I have a hard time believing the dr wouldn't use something safe in pregnancy if he/she knew.

I absolutely would not move forward with a surro that has unexplained pain that is so bad she would need morphine. If you do move forward, I would request copies of the medical records and find out if the pregnancy was disclosed and why something else wasn't used.

I would not trust a surro who even felt comfortable taking morphine knowing she was pregnant! She is either so uneducated as to believe it could be possibly okay or she is uncaring for the child she is carrying because it is not hers. In either case, I don't think I would be comfortable moving forward with her. As for other surrogates, I don't this situation is the "norm". There are many surrogates that will contact the IP's and discuss pains or not feeling well. Don't give up on surrogacy because you've had your heart broken by one surrogate who clearly was unworthy of carrying your child in the first place.

I'm a surro and not an IP but I wanted to comment on this subject, especially the part I quoted. That part says it all as far as I'm concerned. She is either too uneducated or too uncaring. Either way it's not someone I would want to continue to deal with. I don't care how nice they are. There's too much at stake for you. The average person knows that you shouldn't take certain things while pregnant. They also know you should tell a doctor you are pregnant.

I agree with a PP that I have a hard time believing a doctor would give someone morphine knowing they are pregnant. If this was a trip to the Emergency room then why didn't they automatically do a pregnancy test or at least ask her?